Page 31 - NAMAH-Jul-2025

Namah Vol. 33, Issue 2, 15th July 2025

The Becoming, as Antidote to Trauma survivor of childhood sexual abuse — to feel
my life-held purpose, that I was more than
There are many who refuse to believe that my abuse, that I could now fully embark on
this kind of direct healing is possible. Those the quest for my own soul inside of God’s
who have experienced childhood trauma, vision.
which is still all too common in our world,
can feel acutely disconnected from the Divine. The Becoming is that creative vision, of the
The sense of injury and abandonment from Supreme, the Absolute, the Divine.
God clouds the possibility of reunion with
the Source. How could a loving God allow
for abuse, disease, violence, heartbreak? I
believe if we could all know the truth of the
why we are here, and our soul’s purpose in
the unfolding, and that God is in everything
and everywhere, even the worst and ugliest
— and that we actually are eternal souls —
this would begin to alleviate this epidemic
hardening towards God. We would begin to
lose “the dividing reason,” as Sri Aurobindo
details in an aphorism:
The Supreme’s creative impulse, in creating
“When I had the dividing reason, I shrank the worlds, was to experience Itself in
from many things; after I had lost it in sight, I multiplicity, in the Divine Play. Behind the
hunted through the world for the ugly and the Divine Play, or Lila, is absolute Delight, or
repellent, but I could no longer find them (2).” AAnanda, of the Supreme in the unfolding
and miraculousness of the Creation. It is
I arrived to the path of Integral Yoga after the child’s joy, the poet’s joy, the actor’s joy,
years as a Christian, still with the burning the artist’s joy, perpetually inexhaustible,
desire to solve the riddle of existence. I had creating and re-creating Himself in Himself
in my childhood felt deep bhakti/divine for the sheer bliss of that self-creation,
love for and from Christ, but my restless of that self-representation — Himself
intellect was not sated by the stories of the the play, Himself the Player, Himself the
Crucifixion and the Resurrection. Why was Playground.
it so very hard to be a human — was there a
greater meaning behind our deep struggles? When we choose to travel to new places,
What exactly was this place, Earth? When I sometimes quite different from our own
learned of the Becoming, in the words of Sri hometowns, we learn about ourselves,
Aurobindo, I felt I had finally found the truth of our strengths, our good-heartedness, our
existence and needed only to continue to read blind spots, our ignorance. With that same
His Works to know more and more deeply adventurous spirit, God chose to travel, to
that truth. Encountering the concept of the first split into two so that there would be a
Becoming greatly helped my own trauma as a partnership during the voyage — the Issvara,

38