Page 17 - NAMAH-Apr-2020

Namah What is Real ?

Through a process of introjection, Catherine asking the question, how can I still be a loving
had in essence internalised the negligent daughter and a caring human being without
mother. She paid no attention to her own automatically assuming the role of protector
needs but rather gave to others to the point and exclusive caregiver? Catherine had five
of exhaustion and repressed anger and siblings.
resentment. Introjection is a term that
describes a psychic process whereby one During our work Catherine also had the
internalises, absorbs inwardly — both insight to walk away from a marriage
consciously and unconsciously, negatively proposal that would have landed her in
or positively — emotions, beliefs and self- the same relational dynamic as that with
image. her mother. She came to understand that
this self-sacrificing role was one that she
Catherine required the attention of a loving, continued to replicate with her partners,
caring ‘Other’, someone who acknowledged bosses, siblings and friends, always caving
her needs and value apart from her sacrificing into their needs and not asserting her own.
self. Through the process of transference, And it was not as if drive, power and
Catherine was able to shift the constellation assertion were not part of her nature. She
of dynamics associated with her mother to had a strong sense of personal power and
her analyst. Transference is a mechanism by inner-assertion, clearly apparent in her
which a complex, a constellation of dynamics, passion for human and social justice and
feelings and desires, originally associated her love for nature and the planet.
with one person, such as a parent, are
unconsciously shifted to another.The Catherine has reached a place of greater self-
therapeutic psychoanalytical process of acceptance; a place where she is comfortable
Object Relations was further applied. This with her introverted personality, her body,
theory posits that the way people relate to her lifestyle, which is radically different
others and situations in their adult lives, is from the one she grew up in. Although
often shaped by family experiences during she is frequently sought out by friends and
infancy and early childhood. Since Catherine family, she will often opt for the things that
was open to a transpersonal dimension, that she enjoys, without sacrificing her sense of
is, dimensions beyond her personal narrative, an appropriate care for others.
these factors were also brought into the work
giving further meaning and understanding Returning to the issue of Real and Reality,
to her present condition. viewed through the lens of a psychological
therapeutic application, what we again see
Catherine eventually came to understand that is that reality is not fixed but rather can
her relationship with her mother was life- be malleable through a process of inner
negating, laden with a heavy sense of guilt, restructuring.
obligation and dread. She slowly pulled away
from her habitual patterns of always showing Having touched on the issue of Real and
up, at no matter what the personal price, Reality from several angles, that is, cutting-
without examining her options; without edge science, Buddhism’s understanding

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